Saturday, January 7, 2012

#24: Admit You Need Help

I was a stubborn cancer patient. After years of complete independence, I wanted to make sure the same could be said for my recovery from cancer - that I did it on my own.

Despite my hardheadedness, there were still things I needed help with. Keeping my health and recovery my top priority, I was forced me to swallow my pride and admit I couldn't do it alone. My boyfriend assumed responsibility for all my meals, my mom covered my prescription expenses, my family drove me to and from every oncologist and chemo appointment, my sisters took care of me after every treatment, including one week when I was completely bedridden, and one time I even demanded a friend come over to console my bummed out self.

Looking back, I wish I had asked for help sooner, and more often.

So, this week, after ripping one pair of pants and forcing myself to accept my thighs didn't fit into another, I signed up for Weight Watchers. I would never have thought my disciplined, motivated self would need help losing weight, but after a year of indulgence, it became obvious I needed to get back to reality. My goal is reasonable, and already I can feel how helpful the online tracking system will be in helping me get there over the next few months.

Just like my retrospective on treatment, I'll bet once I reach that goal I'll wish I admitted I needed help much sooner.

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